One AM Musings

Mercury is in retrograde (again?!) and I am drained. Summer is my least favorite season. I have suffered from migraines since I was young and the heat makes it even more unbearable. The humidity turns my mind and body to all but slush and saps all my energy and honestly there’s not much of it. Yesterday I took a grand total of four naps and not one of them was fulfilling. I do also have a cold so my body is fighting that perhaps but man, am I tired. Emotionally and physically I am drained.

My boyfriend broke up with me in the beginning of June and two days afterwards my grandmother died. To say the start of my summer has been rough is an understatement but then again my summers are never easy…In August it will be 11 years since my mother had her catastrophic stroke that rendered her paralyzed on the right hand side and unable to speak or walk. Since then, summers have always felt cursed.

I like to lose myself in a world away from ours. Books have always been a cheap getaway for me and a source of great happiness. Between the pages lies a host of characters, conflict, universes, and secrets that I can dissect and unravel. I love learning new words and exploring new places. These books make me want to go to these specific locations real or not.

Life is hard. I know this. I’ve lived it. It’s what we make if it ultimately that shapes who we are in the end.

2 thoughts on “One AM Musings

  1. Books are incredible. They fill us with so many wonderful stories, and emotions that could never be expressed through words alone.

    Haruki Murakami wrote “Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.”

    You have clearly gone through a lot, however you still manage to find the strength to seek happiness. You’ve taken those hardships and used them to leap yourself forward. Refusing to sink into that bottomless ocean. That’s true strength. Books are capable of healing, and strengthening the soul.

    Your post truly touched my heart. I look forward to seeing more posts from you. From the photo you attached, you have amazing variety. You are very much like a book, actually. You have a strong, durable front and back cover, capable of surviving any storm. The spine created and held by the people you’ve met and the loved ones you’ve kept close. And your pages filled with your life’s journey. Never let your ink run dry, because you have many more pages to go.

    I believe in you.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s